Yu's a good guy but he doesn't do things without a good reason! Well...most things. [ He's not into the fishing or the cats, but Yu seems to like it anyway. ] So my guess is you had to have deserved it.
[ Not that Rise can't take care of herself, but he knows she likes attention from Yu more than anyone. That doesn't mean that Yosuke wouldn't step in a put a stop to something if this guy was actually stalking her or something. She's a friend first, idol second.
Then Leon has to go and point that out. Yosuke goes right from concerned friend to self-conscious seventeen year-old. ]
[But that argument gets stopped in its tracks by Yosuke's reaction to what Leon had thought was an innocent question. Was there something to this wall thing? More than just it being kinda funny? He looks again, and still doesn't see anything amiss, but there's some definite amusement on his face now.]
What're you acting all suspicious about? I totally didn't think anything of it, but now I'm kinda wondering!
[ There is definitely something to that wall. That something being Yosuke's ass. He straightens, trying to press himself closer to the wall, which really just makes himself look more ridiculous. ]
There's nothing about it! At all! It's a wall. I want to lean on it, is that so weird?
It wasn't weird until you started acting weird about it! Are you hiding something back there or what?
[Does he really want to know? He's beginning to suspect he doesn't, and yet his curiosity is getting the better of him here. He's not looking down there anymore, though, for the moment. Yosuke's face already speaks volumes.]
[ You don't want to know, Leon! You don't. Does he want to admit it? Probably not. But will Leon just...you know, stop if he doesn't come clean? He's got no clue. ]
L-Look...we've all got--all of these swimsuits are jacked, okay?
[He can't precisely guess at it, but . . . he has an idea, at least, of what's going on now. Yikes. He looks away from Yosuke's jacked swimsuit again, lifting his hands in surrender.]
And I don't wanna be thinking about your ass, so we're in total agreement there!
[Even knowing explicitly now that the issue involves his ass is a little more than he wanted, here!
He goes back to leaning against the wall and not looking at or thinking about any asses. But . . . there is one issue he's got to address, here. Some suspicions that are beginning to wiggle insidiously into his mind.]
. . . Lemme guess, you can't go anywhere without givin' me an eyeful, huh?
[He reaches over to smack Yosuke's shoulder in the least touchy, most bro way possible. There's not going to be any lingering while they're talking about ass. Pat pat. That's all you get.]
Trust me, I ain't offended! . . . I mean, not that my ass isn't totally great, but—you know! You get me, right? Right!
[RIGHT.]
But how're you making it go into the wall like that? It's a wall! It's—
[It's . . . not as solid as it used to be. Leon was just stepping away to put his hand on it and demonstrate, but this time his hand sinks in a little, because that's what's on his mind.]
[ Hey, that's cool. Yosuke speaks bro pretty fluently so he can tell a bro-touch from a boi-touch, if you know what I'm saying. (Do you? Because this is getting ridiculous.) ]
Yeah, yeah I get you. [ Bros don't rate each other's asses. They just don't. Except Yu's, maybe, but that's because they're partners. It's different okay.
When Leon tries and succeeds at becoming one with the wall, Yosuke feels very validated. ]
[ Yosuke isn't crazy! Well, a little crazy, and maybe he should just accept that everyone has to let it hang out, but...why do that when you can stick your ass in a wall? ]
It's...not super uncomfortable? And I figure that it'll provide some cover until I figure out how to get outta here.
'Cuz you're totally acting like it! Duh, no one wants that! . . . I guess probably some people want that, but that ain't the point! If I'm dealing with it you've gotta too!
[This isn't going to work, is it. He pauses, then tries another tactic, grinning.]
Man, just think of it as like, your payment for all the girls' asses you're gonna get to see today.
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[ Not that Rise can't take care of herself, but he knows she likes attention from Yu more than anyone. That doesn't mean that Yosuke wouldn't step in a put a stop to something if this guy was actually stalking her or something. She's a friend first, idol second.
Then Leon has to go and point that out. Yosuke goes right from concerned friend to self-conscious seventeen year-old. ]
Uh--
[ CRINGE. ]
I just...it's comfortable! That's all!
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[But that argument gets stopped in its tracks by Yosuke's reaction to what Leon had thought was an innocent question. Was there something to this wall thing? More than just it being kinda funny? He looks again, and still doesn't see anything amiss, but there's some definite amusement on his face now.]
What're you acting all suspicious about? I totally didn't think anything of it, but now I'm kinda wondering!
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There's nothing about it! At all! It's a wall. I want to lean on it, is that so weird?
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[Does he really want to know? He's beginning to suspect he doesn't, and yet his curiosity is getting the better of him here. He's not looking down there anymore, though, for the moment. Yosuke's face already speaks volumes.]
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L-Look...we've all got--all of these swimsuits are jacked, okay?
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[He can't precisely guess at it, but . . . he has an idea, at least, of what's going on now. Yikes. He looks away from Yosuke's jacked swimsuit again, lifting his hands in surrender.]
Here I thought you got it easy!
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[ He shifts awkwardly before crossing his arms. ]
Can we just leave it at that?? I really don't wanna be talking about my ass this much...
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[Even knowing explicitly now that the issue involves his ass is a little more than he wanted, here!
He goes back to leaning against the wall and not looking at or thinking about any asses. But . . . there is one issue he's got to address, here. Some suspicions that are beginning to wiggle insidiously into his mind.]
. . . Lemme guess, you can't go anywhere without givin' me an eyeful, huh?
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Yosuke sighs dramatically, as if the weight on the world rests on his shoulders. Instead, it's just the world getting to see his butt. Same thing. ]
Not a step...and no offense, I don't think I really wanna be following you around, either.
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Trust me, I ain't offended! . . . I mean, not that my ass isn't totally great, but—you know! You get me, right? Right!
[RIGHT.]
But how're you making it go into the wall like that? It's a wall! It's—
[It's . . . not as solid as it used to be. Leon was just stepping away to put his hand on it and demonstrate, but this time his hand sinks in a little, because that's what's on his mind.]
—Whoa.
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Yeah, yeah I get you. [ Bros don't rate each other's asses. They just don't. Except Yu's, maybe, but that's because they're partners. It's different okay.
When Leon tries and succeeds at becoming one with the wall, Yosuke feels very validated. ]
Yeah, see! It's complete cover!
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[He pushes his hand in deeper, until he's in up to his elbow, before pulling it back out.]
Awesome.
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[ Yosuke isn't crazy! Well, a little crazy, and maybe he should just accept that everyone has to let it hang out, but...why do that when you can stick your ass in a wall? ]
It's...not super uncomfortable? And I figure that it'll provide some cover until I figure out how to get outta here.
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[Maybe a little crazy. Leon's both sympathetic and amused.]
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[ He crosses his arms with a huff. ]
I've just got to decide what I'm gonna do next! There's...gotta be a place to get towels or something, right?
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[Does he have some horrible ass disease down there?!]
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[ Actually it's a completely understandable question given how Yosuke is handling the situation. ]
I just don't want people staring at my ass all day!
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[This isn't going to work, is it. He pauses, then tries another tactic, grinning.]
Man, just think of it as like, your payment for all the girls' asses you're gonna get to see today.
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[ Well.
Hm.
Actually...uh... ]
...Uh...well...I didn't actually think of it that way.
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[Also modest. He finally steps away from the wall again himself.]
Every time you catch someone starin' at your ass or whatever, remember one amazing ass you saw today and be like, "I totally came out on top here!"
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...I think I've gotta see some amazing asses before that really evens out.