[IC] Inbox @ recolle

[youraffection]

Yosuke Hanamura

Iiiiiiit's Yosuke! You know what to do. And if you don't, leave a message after the tone. Beep! ...Haha, okay, for real now.

陽介だぜ！わかんねぇだろうな？メッセージを残ってくれ！ピーッつってん後で。ピーッ！　。。。はは、じゃ、まじで。

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[androidheart]

[She pulls open the door to her room. It's very plain––she just moved in after all. There's a few scattered notebooks on a desk and an acoustic guitar in the corner. Actually––the guitar is broken.]

Have you ever sat on your hand?

[youraffection]

[ That...makes him sad, actually. He knows what that must mean to her and it definitely symbolizes something. The guitar was kind of how she defined herself, right? He's not sure if the break was purposeful or not. Neither is a good option. ]

Huh?

[ The question draws his attention. ]

Uh...well, yeah, sometimes?

[androidheart]

It falls asleep, right? You touch something...and it doesn't feel quite like touching it. Like your nerves are dead, but still there.

[Angela runs a metal finger along her cheek.]

You see where I'm going with this, right?

[youraffection]

[ Oh... ]

...Yeah, I get you.

[ In this thought experiment, at least. ]

So you know it's your arm but you can't really feel anything with it.

[androidheart]

Not really, no. At least...not in the same way I'm used to things "feeling".

[She outstretches her arm, lightly pressing her palm into his chest.]

Holding hands as I knew it is gone, for one thing.

[youraffection]

Yeah?

[ There's a pause, but he does hold his hand out, in case she does want to try. ]

What can you tell from it?

[androidheart]

[She does take his hand with the one that's not on his chest, but is far from fully squeezing it.]

It's not the same as it used to be. It doesn't feel warm the way it used to, and...

[A sad, dry laugh.]

It reminds me that...I'll never be able to feel the way that it used to feel again. I can never...really hold hands again.

Just like...all of the other things I'm not going to be able to do soon.

[youraffection]

Angela...

[ It's the first time he's addressed her without that "Miss", always feeling like she needs something that shows respect. But she needs a friend right now, right? Yeah.

He just isn't sure what he can do.

He squeezes her hand automatically, though he quickly realizes that it won't do much. Can she feel the pressure? Just not the heat? ]

[androidheart]

[She can! It's not particularly reassuring though, because...his touch is only reinforcing what is already bothering her. Tears start forming in the corners of her eyes, daring to start to trickle down her cheeks.]

Who could ever love a robot, Yosuke?

[youraffection]

[ Oh...oh no.

Not this. He wants to help, so he says the first thing that comes to mind-- ]

Me?

[ Oh, wait that--probably isn't going to make it better... ]

I-I mean...like--knowing who you are, I can't imagine that someone couldn't love you because of that.

[ He shakes his head, then takes her hand with both of his. ]

Sometimes people suck! But...if I've learned anything over the past year it's that if people can't accept you for all of you, then they're not worth your time. You're a special person no matter what you're made of!

[androidheart]

[Tearfully, she shakes his hands off of hers.]

No you don't...get it! You don't get it!

You can't cuddle a piece of metal! You can't massage it or tickle it or warm it up or keep it cool...

...You can't kiss it...It can't have kids.

I don't care if I'm a special person, I want to...have normal things. Be a normal human...

My days are numbered, Yosuke.

[youraffection]

Angela--

[ She--she has every right to be upset. Her entire life is getting turned upside down in a more extreme way than anyone else's met through Retrospec has had.

But what can he honestly do? ]

...I dunno what to say.

[ He's a loss, for once. He usually has too many things to say. ]

I wanna help, but I dunno what to do. What you want me to do.

[ Don't make this about you, Yosuke. He shakes his head. ]

I just--hearing you say that...

[androidheart]

Go ahead. Lie to me.

[Her voice breaks, choking back tears that just end up dribbling out anyway.]

Tell me that there's some way to fix this! That everything is going to be just fine, and the people at retrospec are just liars. Do you still believe that? Can you confidently tell me that after seeing me? [She moves to shove him with her hand but stops short--the sheer weight of her arm would be like smashing a heavy, blunt object into him. Another thing to watch out for. Ha.]

Just keep lying to me, and trying to pretend like this is some kind of blessing in disguise! Tell me I'll get used to it! Go on! That's what everyone does, so...so...!

[Huff. Puff. Huff. Puff. Her strong stance falters a bit and she stumbles, as if suddenly overcome with dizzyness.]

[youraffection]

[ Angela no, no don't cry! He can't handle crying. He just wants to hug her but he doesn't know if she'll appreciate it. ]

Angela...

[ Oh fuck it, he goes forward to try and hold her when she stumbles. ]

H-Hey...I don't...I don't wanna lie to you. I just wish I could make things better--

[ Fuck. He can't find any of the right words. ]

[androidheart]

You can't.

You can't make things better.

[She doesn't push him away when her puts his hands on her though, instead she just kind of goes limp against him, quietly crying despite Yosuke's inability to handle it.]

You can't do anything...

I don't even know how to hug you without hurting you...

[youraffection]

[ Well, he will hug her, at a loss of anything else to do. There's a distinct different in where the metal of her arms connects with the warmth of her skin at the edge of her shoulder, he can even tell through her shirt. But he doesn't let go. ]

Then I'll hug you...